One of my favourite things is when you put a pleasant mask on an unpleasant sentiment. Like a good swing on all the half beats, or something similar. But only when you genuinely feel happy. Like, "Hey, I understand that things probably can't get any better--but I'm coping just fine." Those moments are nice.
Let me say that I have considered turning this place into more of an experiment in sociological journalism, employing that damned C. Wright Mills principle on every idea that comes out of here. That idea that you are what you are, plus a whole lot more; that you can't really answer your own questions without answering someone else's questions (which I think we've all learned to be truer than we like, or great). It's called the 'Sociological Imagination', and it was the reason I did horribly on my sociology exam*. To sum it up in a few short words, it implores you to look your personal troubles and see how they connect to the greater issues of society. Or in a different few words, WHY THE FUCK SHIT IS HAPPENING AND GETTING YOUR SELF-CENTERED HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS.
That was reminiscent of what my notes for all five courses looked like by the end of the semester.
I feel as though sometimes this whole cultural romance with introspection is another mild/moderate recession in my life. I'm bound by some sort of inner-voice in the form of my T.A. to refrain from saying "in society" or anything of the sort. Don't tell him, but it's implied. However, I would agree that we tend to make an excessive number of generalizations about society these days. See? IT CAN'T BE STOPPED!
That was reminiscent of what my part-love/part-horror/part-film-noir movie script would look like.
So as my level of intelligence drops rapidly over the next few months, I will attempt to get as much out of my average-sized brain. I hope in all sincerity that what comes out is less self-involved than what has in the past, but I'll admit that these things can't always be stopped. Evidently, that's what has kept me on my feet for five years--but who's really keeping score?
This whole thing felt like a incohesive jumble of words. Aw, poo.
In the past I would have killed to be somebody of significance, but I guess I'm all right being second- or even third-string. As long as the people of significance use it right.
Which isn't to say that I would. So maybe this is for the best?
*Not actually true. In fact, the essay on the C. Wright Mills at the end of the exam may be the thing that saves my mark.
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7 comments:
At certain points in my life I sometimes think I may be an existentialist.
But I keep on being proved wrong, just by good moments in life. The world does suck but it is good too.
Lately I'm thinking if something feels disconnected, you need to find something to change. I was told by a friend recently to stop looking for something or someone to bring you some sort of happiness. You need to go find it, and keep on trying to find it. Instead of complaining indolently.
Given its sometimes really frikin hard to find what needs to be changed, or what can possibly be changed at all for that matter.
I think I need to find a good fellowship to join when I get back to university.
"One of my favourite things is when you put a pleasant mask on an unpleasant sentiment. Like a good swing on all the half beats, or something similar. But only when you genuinely feel happy. Like, "Hey, I understand that things probably can't get any better--but I'm coping just fine." Those moments are nice."
- love this.
"which I think we've all learned to be truer than we like, or great"
Holy non sequitur batman.
non-sequitur in the literary device sense, sure.
the logic sense, perhaps not.
let's just assume that what PROBABLY happened was i was replying to a question out loud while typing. but i maintain that it works.
this is over my head, i remember now why i abandoned the world of blogging
I need another dose of Andy's insights. Please. Get on this.
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